The Alice In Chains Fantasy Football Draft Goes Completely Off The Rails

This weekend will be chock-full of fantasy drafts, as we get closer to the NFL’s opening night in Seattle. One of those drafts occurred on Friday, Sept. 3, with the annual Alice in Chains and Friends Fantasy Football League. The members of the league are the who’s who of music, sports, Hollywood, and then, of course, a dopey fantasy football analyst.

The participants, in order of draft position were Scott Ian from Anthrax; WWE Superstar, The Miz, guitar god Jerry Cantrell from Alice in Chains; actors Jerry O’Connell and Jeff Garlin; singer and songwriter Michael Buble; former MLB pitcher and current MLB analyst Adam Wainwright; Mike Inez from Alice in Chains; Slim Jim Phantom from the Stray Cats, and myself.

The league requires a starting lineup of one quarterback, two running backs, two wide receivers, a tight end, two flex spots (RB/WR/TE), a kicker, and a defense. There is no Superflex. The scoring system is a basic half-point PPR with no premium positions or bonus rewards.

However, those drafts are often very different from what you’ll see in your home leagues. The expert drafts are predictable to a degree: Running backs and wide receivers will come flying off the board first, and there will be a wait on quarterbacks and many tight ends. You get the point.

Being that it’s a 10-team league, every roster is going to be stacked. That doesn’t mean that some odd stuff didn't happen (trust me, it did), including something that I’ll discuss below that I have never, ever done in any draft in over 25 years of playing fantasy football.

This particular draft also pushed me to select multiple playersI would rather not have picked, and you’ll find out why as I break down my thought process and selections in each round. If you’ve been following my draft advice, you’ll very much be shocked at some of my decisions.

Alright, let’s get into a draft and a fantasy team I honestly don’t love, even if I should.

Round 1

Notes: Gibbs and Robinson are pretty much chalk in the top two, but Cantrell went rogue and took Cook at No. 3. That’s the highest I’ve seen him picked in a draft. The next four picks were chalk. Inez took Hampton, and Slim Jim went with Barkley. That left me to take McCaffrey. I didn’t want him. I’m afraid of a 30-year-old running back coming off a season with 450 touches. But at No. 10, I pretty much had to do it.

Round 2

Notes: The second round began with my selection of Brown, who I’ll pair with CMC in a backfield that could be solid. The rest of the round was chalk.

Round 3

Notes: Allen was the first quarterback selected. Javonte and Kyren Williams were next, followed by five straight wideouts. It should be noted that O’Connell was on auto pick, as he was shooting a live TV show for Big Brother during the draft. That will unfortunately burn him in a future round. Love was the first rookie picked, and I took Nabers. I was really hoping London fell to me (he went later than expected), but I was sniped by Inez.

Round 4

Notes: As the league’s commissioner, I was also in charge of making sure the guys were ready for their live hits, since the show aired live on SiriusXM Fantasy Sports Radio. That burned me in this round, as I drafted Higgins (I wanted Tetairoa McMillan). As they say, stuff happens, but that definitely bothered me. I almost took McBride, but there will be good tight ends on the board later in a 10-team league. Slim Jim took him after me. Inez took the second quarterback, Jackson, and Garlin, a die-hard Bears fan, took the third tight end, breakout pick Loveland.

Round 5

Notes: Round 5 saw five running backs and five wide receivers picked. This is where O’Connell got burned by auto-draft, as the computer took Jacobs. That could be tough to overcome in his backfield, especially if Jacobs isn’t allowed to return. Montgomery went to Garlin, and sleeper Tuten went to Wainwright. I wanted Wilson, but he went one pick ahead of me, so I grabbed one of my favorite breakout players, Burden, instead. Had I gotten Wilson, I might have still taken Burden at the top of the sixth round. This is where I needed to audible in terms of my strategy.

Round 6

Notes: I’m not even thinking about a quarterback or tight end at this point, because both spots are still very deep. Instead, I took a third running back and another one of my favorite breakouts, Judkins. Inez took the fourth tight end in Warren, and Wainwright grabbed Price as his No. 3 back. Buble took the third quarterback, Maye, and O’Connell was auto-picked the fourth field general, Burrow. The round ended with three consecutive wideouts: Adams, Watson and McLaurin.

Round 7

Notes: Ian took Evans at the top of the round, followed by three backs, including both Stevenson and Henderson, in that order, from New England. Garlin took his quarterback, Daniels, and Slim Jim grabbed Hurts. Since I was still waiting on quarterbacks and tight ends, I took another wide receiver, Washington. He’s another of my favorite sleeper/breakout players.

Round 8

Notes: I continued to build backfield depth by selecting Warren, simply because I am worried about McCaffrey lasting all season. (See how taking him altered everything?) Inez, a Raiders fan, took Washington as high as I’ve seen him drafted. Two more tight ends, Kittle and LaPorta, were selected. The Miz took Lawrence as his starting quarterback, ahead of Justin Herbert and Dak Prescott. Ian finished the round with his third consecutive wide receiver, the rookie Tate.

Round 9

Notes: Ian took his fourth consecutive wideout and second rookie in Concepcion. He would be the only receiver taken in the round. Cantrell took Prescott, which I love because now he’ll have to root for my Cowboys, and Wainwright grabbed Herbert. The running back position was the most prominent in the round, as Corum, Dowdle, Croskey-Merritt, Mason, Dobbins and Pollard were all picked. I ended up taking Fannin, in part, because I know Miz wanted him later in the round.

Round 10

Notes: Once again, drafting CMC affected my selection. This time, it’s Black. I didn’t want to miss out on him as McCaffrey’s handcuff, so I took him maybe a little sooner than I would have otherwise in a 10-team league. Five receivers were picked.

Round 11

Notes: Aubrey went at the start of Round 11. If I didn’t have to draft Black to handcuff CMC, I might have taken him. Stribling went in this round, too, but I’ve seen him go as high as Round 7 in a 12-team league, so Miz got a potential bargain. I decided to take another wideout, Godwin, rather than select a quarterback. I’m the only team without a single quarterback.

Round 12

Notes: I should have taken Caleb Williams with this pick. Instead, I took Allgeier as a potential trade chip (Slim Jim has Love, who might not play in Week 1). As if I angered the fantasy gods, three of the next four picks were quarterbacks, including Williams. The teams that picked those three had a starter (yes, Williams is a backup for Inez), which thinned my available quarterback options in Round 13. Oddly, Ian took a second defense, the Seahawks, even after he selected the Rams defense two rounds earlier.

Round 13

Notes: Ian took his second quarterback, Purdy, and three more defenses (Broncos, Eagles, Ravens) were picked in the round. As it came to my turn, and I’m regretting not taking Williams in the previous round, I ended up grabbing Mahomes, the best quarterback left on my board. I don’t love the pick (isn’t that crazy? I’m talking about Mahomes), but it’s not the worst thing in the world, since I waited to pick a QB1 until Round 13. I’ve never waited that long to take my first quarterback. Ever. I’m not expecting him to return to an elite level, but he’s still Mahomes.

Round 14

Notes: I wanted to take another quarterback, and the best player on my board was Stafford. I’m expecting regression from his top-three fantasy finish from a season ago, but I’m hoping it’s not a freefall. I’ll be playing the weekly matchups with Mahomes and Stafford and hope for the best. Maybe I’m being a little too pessimistic? Two more defenses (Jaguars, Chargers) and four wide receivers, including Downs, Robinson, Samuel and Lane were also picked in the round.

Round 15

Notes: Okonkwo started the round for Ian, and The Miz grabbed a potential steal in Murray as his No. 2 quarterback. I wanted Fairbairn, but he went to Cantrell. My audible would have been the Steelers defense, but Garlin grabbed them ahead of me. With Little and Myers also taken in the round, I grabbed the next-best kicker, Reichard. He was pretty underrated in 2025 fantasy.

Round 16

Notes: My final pick has to be a defense, and I went with the Vikings. I like their Week 1 game, a home matchup against a Packers offense that won’t have Jacobs. The round also included four kickers (Butker, Mevis, McPherson and Pineiro), four backs and a tight end in Henry.

Final Roster

QBs – Mahomes, Stafford
RBs – McCaffrey, C. Brown, Judkins, J. Warren, Black, Allgeier
WRs – Nabers, Higgins, Burden, Washington, Godwin
TEs – Fannin
Ks – Reichard
DEFs – Vikings

Add us as a preferred source on GoogleFollowPublished 3 minutes ago | Modified 3 minutes agoMICHAEL FABIANO

Michael Fabiano is a fantasy football analyst for Sports Illustrated. His weekly rankings and Start 'Em, Sit 'Em articles are must-reads for fantasy players. Before joining SI in August 2020, he worked for CBS Sports, NFL Network and SiriusXM. He also contributes to Westwood One Radio and the Locked on Dynasty Podcast. Fabiano was the first fantasy analyst to appear on one of the four major TV networks and is a member of the Fantasy Sports Writers Association Hall of Fame.

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